My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.
Jimmy CarrIn Pizza Express you can get garlic bread with cheese and tomato. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but that's a pizza.
Jimmy CarrI'm obsessed with TV. How wrong our parents were when they said we should only watch an hour a day. Stop wasting your time reading books.
Jimmy Carr