Swimming is good for you, especially if you're drowning. Not only do you get a cardiovascular workout but also you don't die.

People with Tourettes.....What makes them tick?

Recently my girlfriend asked me if I was having sex behind her back and I replied, "Yes, who did you think it was?"

When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.

When someone close to you dies, move seats.

Eighteen years since the Chernobyl disaster. Is it just me surprized? Still no superheroes!

After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.