You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.

Boxers don't have sex before a fight. Do you know why that is? They don't fancy each other.

See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Rohypnol

Like most of the world's population I'm into coffee, my perfect weekend would start with a pint of coffee.

Swimming is good for you, especially if you're drowning. Not only do you get a cardiovascular workout but also you don't die.

Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.

I did a gig in the U.S. once for the homeless. I said 'It's nice to see so many bums on seats.'