See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Rohypnol

I think they got it wrong with Saddam Hussein. They thought he had the A-Bomb. Instead he had a bomb.

When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.

Jesus loves you... He's not 'in love' with you.

In Pizza Express you can get garlic bread with cheese and tomato. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but that's a pizza.

All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.

I've got a friend whose nickname is "Shagger". You might think that's pretty cool. She doesn't like it.