Ten years after the Chernobyl accident, and am I the only one that's disappointed? Still no superheros.

Boxers don't have sex before a fight. Do you know why that is? They don't fancy each other.

The reason old man use Viagra is not that they are impotent. It's that old women are so very ugly.

I did a gig in the U.S. once for the homeless. I said 'It's nice to see so many bums on seats.'

My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.

I had a survey done on my house. 8 out of 10 people said they really rather liked it

Eighteen years since the Chernobyl disaster. Is it just me surprized? Still no superheroes!