After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.

I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was 'Shout For Help'.

Like most of the world's population I'm into coffee, my perfect weekend would start with a pint of coffee.

The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job.

Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.

A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.

I like to write a joke without any fat on it.The shorter the better. I cater for people with ADD, basically.