I'm obsessed with TV. How wrong our parents were when they said we should only watch an hour a day. Stop wasting your time reading books.
Jimmy CarrRecently my girlfriend asked me if I was having sex behind her back and I replied, "Yes, who did you think it was?"
Jimmy CarrIt is such a social thing, laughing. Two thousand people in a room laughing is such a great buzz and they tend to laugh much more in a group.
Jimmy CarrOnce I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.
Jimmy Carr