I, of course, don't have an accent. This is just how things sound when they are pronounced properly.

I pay what I have to and not a penny more.

Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot.

I did a gig in the U.S. once for the homeless. I said 'It's nice to see so many bums on seats.'

The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job.

The bigger the audience, the better with comedy.

I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.