I have no problems with buying tampons. I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a "proper" present. "Happy birthday, mum!"

I'm not being condescending, I'm too busy thinking about far more important things you wouldn't understand.

I pay what I have to and not a penny more.

I think they got it wrong with Saddam Hussein. They thought he had the A-Bomb. Instead he had a bomb.

My favourite road sign is 'Falling Rocks'. What exactly am I supposed to do with that information? They may as well have a sign saying "Random accidents ahead", "Life's a lottery, Be lucky."

When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.

Eighteen years since the Chernobyl disaster. Is it just me surprized? Still no superheroes!