Say what you want about the deaf.

Viagra has instructions: 'Keep away from children' - what kind of man do you think I am?

I have no problems with buying tampons. I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a "proper" present. "Happy birthday, mum!"

Saying that you don't believe in magic but do believe in god is a bit like saying you don't have sex with dogs, except labradors.

I was out with a friend and he came over with a pair of girls. I said to him "They're like buses." He said "What? Because you wait for ages and then two come along at once." I said "No, they are like buses!"

My father always used to say, "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger," - 'til the accident.

Ten years after the Chernobyl accident, and am I the only one that's disappointed? Still no superheros.