I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead.

Cats have nine lives. Makes them ideal for experimentation.

I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead.

I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.

I go around the country and do a simple gag like, 'The property ladder is now a snake' and get a real laugh.

I, of course, don't have an accent. This is just how things sound when they are pronounced properly.

As soon as I did my first five minutes of stand-up I knew that I would rather be a failure at comedy than a success in marketing.