If two people want to get married, get married! The Victorians had a great saying: As long as it doesn't scare the horses, do what you want. And I absolutely believe that.

We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then don't watch us.

I love the way my life has fallen into place.

There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.

Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.

Nothing is yours permanently so you better enjoy it while it's happening.

The psychic scars caused by believing that you are ugly leave a permanent mark on your personality.