Somehow, some way, every person in the arts has to find an accommodation with disappointment and embarrassment. They are the pollen in the air we breathe. If you must go into the arts, go into them for yourself alone. On some basic level you must enjoy the act of doing it ... Otherwise, you are going to end up frustrated and unhappy. Recognition in the arts is luck and gravy.

We all mourn in our own way. I mourn with a great steak.

Joan Collins told a reporter that she hasn't had plastic surgery; come on... she's had more tucks than a motel bedsheet!

Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.

My sex life has gone from bad to pathetic. My G spot stands for godforsaken.

Everyone thinks Angelina Jolie was the first celebrity baby hoarder, but she wasn't. Before Angelina there was Mia Farrow. Mia had an entire farm full of children. I think she got them at Costco.

My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.