I could never be in a cult. For starters, they never accessorize properly. David Koresh had no fashion sense, Jim Jones wore leisure suits, and I don't care how charismatic Osama bin Laden was, an AK-47 and an insulin drip do not take the place of drop earrings or a well-placed brooch.

I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.

I said to my husband, 'my boobs have gone, my stomach's gone, say something nice about my legs.' He said, 'Blue goes with everything.'

I have so little sex appeal that my gynecologist calls me "sir."

If you're saying the same line 10 times and making it look like you just came up with it, that's acting.

I was my own buddy in camp.

Girls just want to have fun. Well, so do old ladies!