Life is very tough. If you don't laugh, it's tough.
If you don't want gays in the military, make the uniforms ugly.
I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.
She's so fat, she's my two best friends.
It's been so long since I made love, I can't even remember who gets tied up.
I think I'm in a business where you have to look good, and it's totally youth-oriented.