When you're first-generation money, you want to say, "I got a Mercedes and a Rolls and a Lamborghini. Take a look." When you're second-generation money, you're very quiet behind your country club doors. I think that's why people are much more aware. It's the first-generation wives that have the huge rings and the second-generation says, "Everyone be quiet as we get on our yacht or our private plane."

You know it's time to start using mouthwash when your dentist leaves the room and sends in a canary.

If you're saying the same line 10 times and making it look like you just came up with it, that's acting.

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party. Meaning, you can't go horseback riding with Jackie O in Central Park if you're going to make a joke about her that night.

Don't talk to me about gravity. When I get out of bed in the morning, I have to be careful not to step on my breasts.

Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.