I don't think I'm good in bed. My husband never said anything, but after we made love he'd take a piece of chalk and outline my body.

I hate thin people; 'Oh, does the tampon make me look fat?'

I have no boobs whatsoever. On my wedding night my husband said, 'Let me help you with those buttons' and I told him, 'I'm completely naked'.

I love gay and lesbian parents. But I think we need a law that says lesbians and gay men have to raise their children together. This way, the kids would not only know how to build bookshelves, but they'd also instinctively know how to decorate them.

Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.

Half of all marriages end in divorce- and then there are the really unhappy ones.

She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.