I started my career in a town so small the local clinic was called Fred's Hospital and Grill.

The psychic scars caused by believing that you are ugly leave a permanent mark on your personality.

Put me up against Sarah Silverman and I could take her.

I could be the Greta Garbo of comedy, very secluded, but Garbo had a man who was beyond rich to support her.

I have to tell you that it's not going to be easy. Take every chance and every opportunity that you can. Don't say 'I can't' or 'I shouldn't' or 'I'm too tired.'

The fun of working on the road means stealing from hotels. I've been doing it for so long, I have a set of towels from the Ark.

My grandson is mad at me. He's mad at me because I squandered his college fund on Spanx. It's a lot, but there's a lot going on here.