Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.
Put me up against Sarah Silverman and I could take her.
The worst thing that ever happened to me on stage is someone ran forward to tell me they loved me and projectile vomited all over the stage. It was horrible.
Omaha is a little like Newark, without Newark's glamour.
Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
I started my career in a town so small the local clinic was called Fred's Hospital and Grill.