I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: "Last Girl Before Freeway."

Two is company; three is fifty bucks.

When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. When a woman has a birthday, she takes at least three years off.

The last time I appeared in Las Vegas, they were wearing hoop skirts and Davy Crockett hats, ... But they say 'What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.' And as far as fashion is concerned, that's a good thing.

The fashion magazines are suggesting that women wear clothes that are 'age appropriate.' For me that would be a shroud.

Does fashion matter? Always - though not quite as much after death.

Why should I cook for my husband? So he can tell a hooker I make a delicious cake?