If you don't go to Broadway, you're a fool. On Broadway, off Broadway, above Broadway, below Broadway, go! Don't tell me there isn't something wonderful playing. If I'm home in New York at night, I'm either at a Broadway or an Off Broadway show. We're in the theater capital of the world, and if you don't get it, you're an idiot.

The Palestinians cannot throw rockets and expect people not to defend themselves

Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny.

A Mafia guy in Vegas gave me this advice: "Run your own race, put on your blinders."

A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.