Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for another three months.
My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.
Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.
The glass is always half empty. All good comedians are manic-depressive.
Al Roker said I am 80 years 'young'; it's like saying Al Roker is 320 pounds 'thin'.
my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.