We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then don't watch us.
If you're not a wreck in this business, you're not around.
I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.
After we made love he took a piece of chalk and made an outline of my body.
[When told that her grandchild had her nose:] I didn't get this nose until I was thirty-four.
I'm no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.