I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.

Obama came in and said he was going turn everything around, and you can't. Give the guy a break. But I question a lot of what's happening. It's certainly going to reflect in my vote, but who else is there? It's a horrible time, because people vote party lines instead of what's good for the country. I think the whole health care issue turned so ugly, because of party lines, and that's not what that's supposed to be about.

Comedy is truth. We should not apologize for it.

I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: "Last Girl Before Freeway."

You don’t marry for love. What does love got to do with marriage? I spit on love and marriage. You marry for money.

Don't talk to me about gravity. When I get out of bed in the morning, I have to be careful not to step on my breasts.

Remember a few years ago when they left Bea Arthur out of the death reel at the Oscars? Bea Arthur! How did they leave Bea Arthur out? She was in Mame; she was in All in the Family; she was in Maude; she was a Golden Girl, for God's sake! Bea was not only one of Hollywood's leading ladies, she was one of Hollywood's leading men!