The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.

My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it's missing, and what's there stinks.

Dogs are easier to love than people; they're certainly more dependable. Once they love you, that's it. A true friend in life is a dog.

I adore my apartment in New York. It was a ballroom that I remade, so it's like a loft but done by Louis the Fifteenth.

Happiness, at my age, is breathing

I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.

my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.