I think it was Cosby who also said to me, 'If only 2 percent of the world thinks you're funny, you'll still fill stadiums for the rest of your life.'

One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.

You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.

The fun of working on the road means stealing from hotels. I've been doing it for so long, I have a set of towels from the Ark.

I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny.

I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.

"I've learned what's funny verbally ain't so funny on e-mail: They don't hear your intonations. Melissa broke up with somebody over that. She tried to tell him: "That was a joke!" But he just didn't get it. Mick Jagger said, "F- 'em if they don't get the joke." And I love him. That comes with age: Knowing it's their problem, not mine."