My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.

One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.

"I wouldn't go over here to Lisa Rinna and I would say 'Are those breasts real, are you wearing underwear?'"

I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, "Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe."

Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.

I was just reading about the new Lindsay Lohan diet, which is all liquid. 80 proof.

Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.