I was not an attractive child. When I didn't use my Girl Scouts uniform as a uniform, I used it as a tent.

Self-pity shortens your life.

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.

My face has been tucked in more times than a bedsheet at the Holiday Inn.

Better laid than never.

I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag.

My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it's missing, and what's there stinks.