Anyone that says looks don't count is lying.

You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.

Marriage isn't a contest to see who is most often right. Marriage requires being what the Japanese call 'the wise bamboo,' which means you bend so you don't break. Treat your spouse with the flexibility and respect you would give to a top client. Think how we treat clients; We smile, we are polite, we listen to their ideas. Never forget that your spouse is your most important client.

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

The last time I saw a blonde with red streaks in her hair she was laying on Oscar Pistorius' bathroom floor.

But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party. Meaning, you can't go horseback riding with Jackie O in Central Park if you're going to make a joke about her that night.

My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I'd scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus - that way, I'd visit him every day.