My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.
I have to tell you that it's not going to be easy. Take every chance and every opportunity that you can. Don't say 'I can't' or 'I shouldn't' or 'I'm too tired.'
She's so fat, she's my two best friends.
In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected; the only surprise is a day that has none.
Self-pity shortens your life.
Before we make love, my husband takes a pain killer.