The nice thing about Viagra is that they are proving men can go blind on it, so you can gain weight and have a great sex life.

you have to do more than just kill time or time will quickly kill you.

Better laid than never.

Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for another three months.

There's always an adjective before my name, and it's never a nice one.

I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, "Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe."

I love Israel for its blue and white flag as it matches my legs.