I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage.

What are people going to do? Fire me? I've been fired before. Not book me? I've been out of work before. I don't care.

I hate McDonald's. I don't want to order my dinner by yelling into a clown's mouth. If I want my face in a clown's mouth, I'll tongue kiss Glenn Beck.

I was getting dressed and a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.

old age' is always ten years more than we are.

I now consider it a good day when I don't step on my boobs.

I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow.