Life is a movie, and you're the star. Give it a happy ending.
If you can't make fun of yourself, you don't have any right to make fun of others
Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
I'll lie still for a lot of things - but sex isn't one of them.
My mother was a very elegant woman. When a flying saucer landed on the lawn, she turned it over to see if it was Wedgwood.
I was so flat I used to put Xs on my chest and write, 'You are here.' I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have something to pet.