Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for another three months.
There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.
You don’t marry for love. What does love got to do with marriage? I spit on love and marriage. You marry for money.
You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.
What we do is a calling...we make people happy.
How to fool yourself into feeling younger: When you go to restaurants, always check a coat and a skateboard.