I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.
That baby is so ugly... I've never seen a six-month-old so desperately in need of a wax.
There's always an adjective before my name, and it's never a nice one.
Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
Since I met him ten years ago there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of George Burns. And I didn't think of him again today.