With age comes wisdom. You don't need big boobs to be feminine. Look at Liberace.

Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.

[When told that her grandchild had her nose:] I didn't get this nose until I was thirty-four.

I was so ugly that my parents sent my picture to 'ripley's believe it or not' - they sent it back and said, "we don't believe it."

I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

My sex life has gone from bad to pathetic. My G spot stands for godforsaken.