Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
I think I'm in a business where you have to look good, and it's totally youth-oriented.
God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.
Mel Gibson's father doesn't think there was a Holocaust? Great. I don't think there's a movie. We're even.
Just remember: Surviving is the best revenge, no matter what the disaster has been.
Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.