Comedy is a very rough beat. It's no holds barred, as it should be.

Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'

What I love about jewelry is you can change it for something else without surgery.

Looking 50 is great, if you're 60.

Omaha is a little like Newark, without Newark's glamour.

My daughter refuses to call me mother in public; my little grandson calls me Spongeslob Squarebottom, and nobody else ever calls me at all.

If you can't make fun of yourself, you don't have any right to make fun of others