Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
Joan RiversI always like a charity with people who don't speak English because I get them to do all kinds of things around my house.
Joan RiversHaving my daughter, I screamed for twenty-three hours straight. And that was just during conception.
Joan RiversI wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.
Joan RiversIf you don't go to Broadway, you're a fool. On Broadway, off Broadway, above Broadway, below Broadway, go! Don't tell me there isn't something wonderful playing. If I'm home in New York at night, I'm either at a Broadway or an Off Broadway show. We're in the theater capital of the world, and if you don't get it, you're an idiot.
Joan Rivers