I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.
Comedy is truth. We should not apologize for it.
With this face, I need all the deals I can get.
That baby is so ugly... I've never seen a six-month-old so desperately in need of a wax.
Never floss with a stranger.
Don't talk to me about gravity. When I get out of bed in the morning, I have to be careful not to step on my breasts.