I think we all in comedi business, especially when we reach a certain age, are divas up to a point. I love when a limousine comes for me, I can't lie about that. I love when you go to a restaurant and they say, "Come this way, Miss Rivers," and you get a good table. I love all that, the perks that come with the business.

I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.

What we do is a calling...we make people happy.

I'm in nobody's circle, I've always been an outsider.

I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.

Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips.

Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.