Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
I will only praise someone who can't take anything away from me.
After we made love he took a piece of chalk and made an outline of my body.
If you don't want gays in the military, make the uniforms ugly.
"I wouldn't go over here to Lisa Rinna and I would say 'Are those breasts real, are you wearing underwear?'"
I was not an attractive child.