I have no sex appeal. If my husband didn't toss and turn, we'd never have had any kids.

Your anger can be 49 percent and your comedy 51 percent, and you're okay. If the anger is 51 percent, the comedy is gone.

I adore my apartment in New York. It was a ballroom that I remade, so it's like a loft but done by Louis the Fifteenth.

I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage.

The last time I appeared in Las Vegas, they were wearing hoop skirts and Davy Crockett hats, ... But they say 'What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.' And as far as fashion is concerned, that's a good thing.

My boobs are so low I had to put curb feelers on my nipples!

At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!