Gay marriage, I am so against it because if all my gay friends get married, it will cost me a fortune in gifts.
My daughter and I are very close, we speak every single day and I call her every day and I say the same thing, "pick up, I know you're there."
Self-pity shortens your life.
We all mourn in our own way. I mourn with a great steak.
Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too.
I don't think there'd be a Tina Fey now if I hadn't tried to look good in the beginning.