We can afford almost any mistake once.

I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

I drink to forget I drink.

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

If you drink like a fish, don't drive: swim.