They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.

I met with an accident on the way to the track; I arrived safely.

I drink to forget I drink.

They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.

You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to roll over and float on his back, then you got something!

I never went to school beyond the 3rd grade, but my mother taught me the difference between right and wrong.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.