You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had lost exactly two weeks.

I don’t drink anymore - just the same amount.

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.

Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

There's only one thing money won't buy, and that is poverty.