I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator.

That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

Life is strange. You keep moving and keep growing. Before you know it, you look back and think, "What was that?"

But it's hard for a chick to do comedy. It's not as open for them.

One of the great things about Houston is that they police themselves. It's the way Boston was in the '80s. No hacks or thieves are tolerated in the community, and that's HUGE.

Never stay in a bad marriage, and don't hang around with psycho coke fiends.

The people who could most benefit from the self-reflective ego-dissolving qualities of cannabis are the ones that want it to be illegal.