What's interesting about science is that we're constantly discovering new things about the universe, about ourselves, about our bodies, about diseases, about the possibilities of the future. It's amazing. Science is one of the coolest things about being a human being - without a doubt.

My act is so completely and totally uncensored that the only way I could really pull it off is if I treat the audience like they're my best friends.

Haters...are all failures. It's 100% across the board. No one who is truly brilliant at anything is a hater.

That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

I like LA because it has a giant supply of great comedians.

People love to see people fall.

When you snatch little pieces of other people's lives and try to palm them off as your own, that's more disgusting than anything. Robin Williams is a huge thief. Denis Leary is a huge thief. His whole stand-up career is based on Bill Hicks, a brilliant guy who died years ago.