You don't really know when stand-up material is TV ready; it's just at what point you're willing to let it go and not work on it anymore. I'm not sure there is a point at which you think: 'And that is finished.'

Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.

Stand-up, for me, is really more of an addiction, so you have to feed the beast whenever you can.

You know that things are not going well when you lose the moral high ground to a TMZ reporter.

People are friendlier in New York than London.

Believe it or not the war on Iraq is based on a sound scientific principle, The bee hive principle. Which clearly states that if you are stung by a bee, you should follow it back to its nest and then proceed to beat nest to a pulp with a baseball bat until the stripey little turd has learned its lesson.

Americans just don't understand dry wit.