I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life.

A Southern accent is not a club in my bag.

I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line there ... I don't think it changes the way they respond.

People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on The Daily Show ... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor.

The British press are a group of unremitting scumbags. And sometimes they use that scumbaggery to good ends, and often not.

Whatever the occasion, [the Queen] has a face which demonstrably says 'I don't give a royal s**t.'

Campaign ads are the backbone of American democracy if American democracy suffered a gigantic spinal injury.