Iran is the middle child of the Axis of Evil. Iraq is the oldest child and gets the lion's share of the attention, and North Korea is the crazy baby.

People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on The Daily Show ... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor.

Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.

Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest.

Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.

A Southern accent is not a club in my bag.

One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.